President Obama was in a celebratory mood last evening and stopped in the middle of a goodbye dinner for departing Secret Service Director Julia Pierson to announce some good news. “I’d like to propose a toast to two crazy kids who have managed to divert most of the country’s attention from negative, confusing and to some, “downright nightmarish” current events. The week began on a frightening note with security breaches here at the White House and continued with all this Ebola going local chitchat. Then Mila Kunis had a baby girl and in a moment of pure genius Mr. Kutcher posted a number of baby pictures on the internet and left it to us to guess which one was theirs. This challenge should keep Americans occupied for days if not weeks. I know even Michelle and I cannot agree on which one is Mila and Ashton’s newborn. With that public relations coup in mind I would like to also announce that I will be nominating Mr. Kutcher to my new cabinet office, Director for Diversionary Tactics. I’ve got 2 more years. I am sure I am going to need his services! To Ashton!