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A Midwest Republican congressman, who has, at least temporarily, chosen to remain anonymous, has proposed legislation, that many have claimed would move the country forward instead of backward. Many reports say it actually contains wording that would have to do with improving the lives of an enormous amount of people throughout the 50 states, if this kind of legislation catches on. The proposal left a judicial body filled with jaws agape! Many of his fellow republicans were being treated for sudden ailments, ranging from apoplexy to irregular heartbeats. Some simply found themselves like fish out of water, gasping for air!

Most horrified GOP legislators are pretty much dumbfounded because the proposed law does not target women, gays, or any specific group, has absolutely nothing to do with religious beliefs and does not put more money into the bank accounts of the already rich, nor does it increase military budgets or deplete and destroy the environment. “I really feel broadsided by this,” claimed one representative. “I mean really! WTF!”

Wearing a black mask, “The Lone Legislator,” as he is being called, spoke with the press. “I know this could be a very scary thing,” he said with just a slight quaver in his voice, “but it just seems like something whose time has come.”

FTM will follow up as soon as more details become available.