Tag Archives: #cnn

News Executives Confirm “Wild Speculation” Is The Future Of News Reporting!

Posted on October 13, 2014 by jr

“People want answers as fast a possible, even if we don’t have them,” explained Jeff Zucker president of CNN, “and it is our job to give them answers, so speculative news gathering is definitely the way to go. And we … Continue reading →

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CDC Warns Of Latest U.S. Danger. Ebola News Fever!

Posted on October 3, 2014 by jr

Sweaty palms, wide open eyes, excitable, fast, speech patterns, inability to mask inner glee are all symptoms of the latest scourge to invade America. The Center for Disease Control has identified the illness as Ebola News Fever. It kills the … Continue reading →

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New A-Mazing Lawn Design Will Solve White House Security Problem!

Posted on September 24, 2014 by jr

The White House Garden and Landscaping Division has offered a design solution for tightening White House security. Based on Britain’s Longleat’s Maze it is nearly two miles of hedge paths and is guaranteed to stymie any fence jumping interloper, giving the Secret … Continue reading →

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