Emory University Study Results: Cheaper Ring = More Successful Marriage! Cracker Jack Sales Soar!!!

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Results of a new research study suggest that smart guys and gals might want to lower their expectations when selecting that engagement ring because it may predict whether your marriage will be made in Heaven…..or just plain Hell.

The study was conducted by a few lonely economics professors at Emory University in Atlanta who surveyed 3,000 U.S. adults who had been married at some point in their lives. (*note: some admitted to being bitter and carrying large grudges against their exes-both the professors and the survey responders)

Results suggest that the higher the cost of the engagement ring, the shorter the marriage. Cheaper rings seemed to bring about longer happier connubial bliss.

To put this in cold hard cash numbers,  results indicated that men who spent between $2,000 and $4,000 on their engagement rings were 1.3 times more likely to get divorced than men who spent between $500 and $2,000.

Men who spent $500 or less, though, were also more likely to get divorced.

Survey responses from women who had received an engagement ring in their lifetime seemed to match up – women who had received big or very expensive rings had a higher rate of divorce than those who had received moderately priced rings.

The ring thing also correlates to the amount of green spent on the wedding day itself.  Couples who had expensive weddings were more likely to experience stress related to finances or debt, and had higher rates of divorce. Couples who spent $20,000 or more on their weddings were 3.5 times more likely to get divorced than those who spent between $5,000 to $10,000.

When asked to comment, a spokesman from Zales, sweating profusely, simply muttered, “Oh Crap!”

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