“I’m rested! I’m ready! I’m limber!” bleated Sarah Palin to the reporters gathered around the card table she set up this morning, outside of Trump Tower in New York City. Surrounded by “Put Palin in the Cabinet” posters and a stack of 8 X 10 portraits for signing, a few sharpies, and a tip jar, Sarah was working the crowd of over 17 people who stopped to pick up a complimentary Kit Kat bar mini, from the candy dish. “Chocolate gives ya energy,” Sarah confidently shouted , attempting to be heard over the Trump Tower Mega speakers, blaring, “Trump for President. He’s Terrific!”
“I know a lot about energy and that is why Mr. Trump should appoint me Energy Czar in his administration. Why, up in Alaska, I even pump my own gas! Ya know, God dumped a cornacropia of energy things right in our laps and that tells me how much he loves us Americans,” she said with obvious pride! …..Bristol, the color ones are 10 bucks”, she called out to her daughter!
“This nation needs someone who isn’t afraid to drill and dig and strip and frack until we have sucked every last sweet drop of oil , every last lump of coal and whatever else we can use, outta this place. But don’t worry, nobody will be breaking any rules on my watch,” she paused for effect…“Cause there won’t be any!” she guffawed.
“I’m a maverick ya know!”