National Donut Day Takes The Edge Off Of Election Results. Grateful Americans Turn To Glazed And Frosted For Both Comfort And Celebration!

Donut Day

Whether sorrowful or celebratory, Americans turned to the ooey gooey goodness of their favorite sugary doughy treat yesterday and rejoiced that we live in a country that has not one, but two National Donut Days! “Frosted or glazed, cream or jelly filled, plain or crumbly, everybody comes together for a donut,” said one man at Dunkin Donuts who had just picked up his 3 dozen plus one free special. “You know I was a little upset at the election results but then I realized what today was, and I just decided to focus on the good things about America. When your mouth is filled with delicious donuts you mmph shurt brsh yr mmhps and then you shffh muth flurp.” Who can disagree with that? Happy National Donut Day!

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Mary’s Random Thought Of The Day

mary's random 11_6_14

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Somebody Was Up All Night To Get Lucky!

Got Lucky

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Gimme A Quote

Best Man Ray

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Walking With Tom On Election Day

Walking withTom11_5_14

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Iowa’s Joni Ernst Plans On Confronting Obama With Her High School Diploma and Dare Him To Show His!!!!!

JoniErnstDare

As promised in her fiery campaign,  newly elected Iowa senator Joni Ernst is already planning on shaking up President Obama. She confided to reporters, this morning that she had been so keyed up on Election Day that she had to castrate over 2 dozen hogs just to take the edge off. But today was a different story and she was raring to go! She actually had to be cautiously restrained by aides, when told that she wouldn’t legally take office until January. With soft cajoling the fingers clenching her rifle slowly relaxed before she made her statement to the press. “You know everyone has made a big deal about Obama’s  birth certificate, but I believe that it doesn’t matter where you are born, We Are All Americans! What I am concerned about are his intelligence qualifications. He plays all smarty pants but where is the proof? It’s not what comes out of your mouth that makes you smart. It’s a certificate by the educators of our country and I’ve got one. It’s called a GED Mr. President. Do you even know what that is? Until I see the proof that he graduated from High School I don’t even want to hear his opinions on anything from global hot/cold stuff to the 37th amendment. Insecure people are fact braggers. Ah hate em!” She then fired a shot over the heads of the reporters and guffawed as they ran for cover. “I’m Joni Ernst. I’m takin’ my shot!”

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Victorious Republicans Distribute “Thank You” Gifts To Supporters! Nothing Subliminal Here!

Thanks Suckers

“Who doesn’t love candy?” laughed Mitch McConnell, obviously on a high from the results of Tuesday’s elections as he giddily passed out handshakes and lollipops at his campaign celebration party. His party managed to pick up enough seats to give them the majority control of the Senate and will now be able to break up the log jam that has kept this country from moving forward. “Sure Wall street is booming, unemployment is down, more Americans than ever have health care but are we really moving in the right direction? That’s what it’s all about… direction…and we are just glad that people heard our message! These sweets are just a small token of appreciation for all the suckers….er….supporters out there who put us over the top!”

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Mary’s Random Thought Of The Day

mary's random 11_5_14

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And Election Night Drags On

Elestion Day

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Gimme A Quote

Bestcharlieparker

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