Category Archives: GTK

And The Award For Sweetest, Most Heartfelt Thanks On Thanksgiving Goes To…

Posted on November 29, 2014 by jr

Rihanna keeping the spirit of Thanksgiving alive in the modern world. “I love you muhphucka Pilgrims!”

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Oprah Poses On Thanksgiving Day With Winning Family Of The “Pose With Oprah On Thanksgiving Day Contest”

Posted on November 28, 2014 by jr

On Thanksgiving Oprah quickly posed with the Allen Family of Carlyle West Virginia, winners of a little known contest, open only to the subscribers of “O” Magazine. Hopefuls were asked to explain in 500 word essays exactly how thankful they … Continue reading →

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Because Nothing Celebrates The Birth Of Jesus Like The Gift Of A New Gun!

Posted on November 28, 2014 by jr

Historically, to celebrate the birth of mankind’s savior, the three wise men brought gifts of gold, frankincense and myhrr, but things have changed a bit in two thousand and fourteen years. Jimmy Sparks of Gunworld explained this years hottest gift. … Continue reading →

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Holiday Tom Turkey Character Actor Fired At Mall. “He Was Really Depressing Everybody!”

Posted on November 26, 2014 by jr

“He was really supposed to get everyone excited about Thanksgiving and gear everybody up for Black Friday Shopping,” said Mall representative Maria Dysoto, “but he really just left everyone rather depressed and made a lot of children cry.” Tom Turkey … Continue reading →

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Allstate Insurance Announces “Black Friday” Coverage For The War Torn And Weary Shopper!

Posted on November 26, 2014 by jr

“People should be able to shop fearlessly on the first day of the Christmas Season,” says Allstate rep, Carol Ingon. “They shouldn’t have to worry about getting a black eye, or a broken arm, or even a concussion, fighting with other shoppers … Continue reading →

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Something Just Popped!

Posted on November 26, 2014 by jr

Something popped!

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Will This Donut Look Good On Me? Get The New Fat-App And See Immediately!!!

Posted on November 25, 2014 by jr

The FDA will soon require chain restaurants and movie theaters to list the amount of calories contained in each item on the menu, in hopes that knowing the calorie count in that mashed potato, cheese and gravy will deter Americans … Continue reading →

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American Music Awards Name One Direction Artist Of The Year. Dedicate Award To Bobby Sherman, Davy Jones and David Cassidy!

Posted on November 24, 2014 by jr

“We wouldn’t be here tonight if it wasn’t for the groundbreaking work of artists who cleared the path for guys like us,” said One Direction’s Harry Styles, on receiving their coveted Artist of the Year Award. “Magazine Covers and cheering … Continue reading →

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J-Lo And Iggy Discuss Staging For “Booty” Performance On Sunday’s American Music Awards!

Posted on November 22, 2014 by jr

J-Lo- First off I am thinkin’ no nipple slips on this show. That got Janet in a mess of trouble. Iggy– Agreed. Okay Imma thinkin’ here’s how we start. J-Lo– Wait! Who enters first? I say smaller booty first, then wow ‘em … Continue reading →

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Takata Says “We”ll Make Replacements For Defective Airbags As Fast As We Can!” Car Owners Say, “Umm….Please Don’t Rush!”

Posted on November 21, 2014 by jr
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