Jennifer Lopez Releases New “ Simple, Personal” Video Called “Booty”

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“I’ve been through so much these past few years that I found I needed to express it in my music more than ever “ said J-Lo. Seeing all the bright young talent on American Idol and coaching them on how to sing, inspired me to dig deeper into my own talent and emotions. I don’t think anyone expected this kind of video from me, so they may be a bit surprised. My new songs are even more personal than in the past. I believe the simple video shows another side of me and stresses how important my lyrics are, but more importantly how much I have grown as an artist.”

 

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Charlize Theron “Loves Getting Older And Watching Her Looks Go To Hell.”

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“I have been waiting for this for so long.” I have always wanted to see all my life experiences written on my face” said Charlize Theron in a recent issue of Red Magazine. I hated spending hours in makeup, in order to play that “Monster” woman. Now all I would need is a little pancake.” Complaining that her face used to be plump with perfect skin, and had no character, Theron says she is now thrilled with the devastation that time has ravaged upon her face. “For God sakes, I am 39 years old. It’s about time!” Current boyfriend Sean Penn agrees and says he loved seeing ex-wife Robin Wright’s looks deteriorate and believes Charlize is even more exciting to watch.

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Mary’s Random Thought Of The Day

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Newly Discovered Dinosaur, Dreadnoughtus, Takes Title Of Largest Terrestrial Animal. Gets Reality Series on “E”

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Weighing in at 65 tons, Dreadnoughtus have no real issues with predators due to their intimidating size and muscular, weaponized tail. Executive producer Ryan Seacrest appears to have another large family hit  series on his hands. The only concern is that they do not topple over, as their extreme size and weight will crush themselves. “Not a problem” boasted Seacrest, “we have plenty of experience with that problem.” Digging Up The Dreadnoughtus premieres Sept. 22 on E.

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Prince Harry Overjoyed to Receive Wedding Dress For His 30th Birthday!

 

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What 30 year old male wouldn’t want to open his birthday gift to find a 33 year old wedding gown with a 25 foot train? That’s what Prince Harry, along with his brother Prince William will receive on his 30th birthday, September 15th as stipulated in Princess Diana’s will. Diana’s brother Earl Spencer has been holding on to it for this momentous occasion. “We are over the moon” Harry tweeted. “We have anticipated this day since we were children. William has always been into trains and me……I just hope it fits.”

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Chelsea Clinton Leaving NBC News. Gets Ready To Start New Job As A Mom!

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After 3 years, working as a correspondent for NBC News, Chelsea Clinton is packing up her name recognition factor and moving on to another job she has no experience in…..Motherhood! She noted that “We may miss that extra $600,000 salary but  my husband Mark is doing very well and like many Americans we’ll just budget a little better and maybe my cook can start couponing. Like last time, it’s a bit scary jumping into something you have never done before, but at this point I’m not worried. My folks always have my back! Anyway, it’s not like it’s a forever job.”

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Angelina Jolie On Her Marriage, ” We All Need Some Good News Right Now. N’est ce pas?”

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Just in time, Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt have swung the media focus away from the chaos, mayhem and all around depressing news in the world by releasing photos of their recent wedding. “I know we said we wouldn’t be married until everybody was allowed to marry, but everyone can get married somewhere, so that’s close enough for me” said Angie. “I believe people need hope and good news right about now don’t you think? And these are very pretty pictures” The newlyweds are spending their honeymoon shopping for a seventh child, but have not revealed in what countries they will be shopping. “We don’t want to start riots” chuckled Brad.

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Mary’s Random Thought Of The Day

Mary's Random 9_4_14 

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Gimme A Quote

best Dr Seuss

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